Do you ask God this question frequently? You are not the only one.
I ask God this question on a daily basis, specially when it comes to relationships. When I hit a wall, I pray to Him for answers and sometimes I feel like He ignores me. I then start to overthink every step I am taking and create a bigger problem than I have.
God communicates with each one of us differently. He talks to us in ways we are willing to listen. For example, God communicates with me through people and situations. When I ask for answers, He usually gives me an answer through a stranger in the most random situation. The way I know it is God rather than myself is the amount of peace I am filled with. It says in Philippians 4:6-7, ‘Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your heart and your minds in Christ Jesus’. God is our peace. If we feel anxious by our Heavenly Father’s answer than it is not Him.
Recently, I have been praying a lot on what a God loving relationship looks like. God was not in my life when I was in my past relationships so I do not know how to include Him in my future relationships. Though, through past experience and a lot of prayer, I feel these are three important things when it comes to starting a God centered relationship:
In today’s world, people (guys & girls) like to make themselves sound better than what they really are. It is about impressing the other person rather then being yourself because if you impress them then they will ‘stick around’. I get it, I am guilty of it myself. Though, it is wrong.
I have learned the most attractive thing about a guy is him being honest about his strength, weaknesses, and who he is as a man. When they are honest about who they are as a person it forms a foundation of a healthy relationship. When I witness someone trying to impress me, I remind them I am interested in who they are as a man and not what they have to offer.
Sometimes being honest about your weaknesses to the opposite sex can be hard because it sets up a target of getting hurt. Honesty goes hand to hand with trust. For a relationship to move forward, you have to let down your walls and trust God that the person will not hurt you.
‘Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity than a rich man who is crooked in his ways’ Proverbs 28:6.
People tend to over look seeing eye-to-eye but it is the most important!
I see this with many relationships within my friends. One person will want a relationship while the other wants to keep their options open. This is not right. First off, do not settle for this because there is someone who dreams of growing with you as theirs.
The both of you should be on the same level when it comes to starting a relationship. If you want to pursue the relationship so should the other person. How do you know if they want to pursue the relationship? Well, it goes back to being honest and talking with one another on what you want. Do not assume anything, being open with one another will strengthen your relationship.
Second, do not wait for this person to change their mind about your relationship status when there is someone in this world who wants exactly what you want. I have learned this the hard way.
Also, I understand moving forward with someone can be terrifying because you do not know the outcome. Will I get hurt? Is this the one? Remember, relationships are about taking risk and learning from them whether there is a lesson out of it or a blessing of a future together. You will never know until you take that first step.
God in the center
This is very important when it comes to starting a relationship because our God wants us to always have Him be the center of our life and not to idolize others.
In a past relationship of mine, I used to idolize the guy. I looked to him for my peace and happiness rather than God. I pushed God to the back of my mind and put all my focus into this human. All I can say is, God was not happy about this. He made it KNOWN to me the relationship would not work if I did not focus on Him. Well, my immature mind did not care what God had to say because I believed I knew what was best for me. What happened next? God took the guy out of my life for good. Exodus 20:3-6 states, ‘You shall have no other gods before me. ‘You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing steadfast love to thousands of those who love me and keep my commandments’. Our God is a jealous God and he will make himself present.
When God is the center of your relationship, it is a relationship that is set up for success. Being able to share faith, prayer, and devotions as one makes our God look down on us in happiness because He knows we are following him together.
We humans like to make a bigger deal out of relationships than what is actually in front of us. Relationships are not meant to be easy but they are meant to be simple than what we make of it. When having God as your focus will cause everything else to fall into place.
Therefore I ask you not to lose heart at my tribulations on your behalf, for they are your glory.For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love